Avoiding long lasting effects on children of divorce
Many children yearly go through the process of a divorce of their parents. Negative effects on children of divorce can have long lasting effects. The process starts long before the actual divorce. Many divorce processes take many years to finalise and are proceeded by disagreements an conflict in the home. As a parent you cannot protect your children from all the things that will happen, but there are ways to minimize the long lasting effects of your divorce.
Things that parents can do to minimize the damage:
Put the children and their feelings as priority
To avoid negative effects on children, do not allow to let your own anger, grief and discomfort get in the way of listening to your childrens needs. Listen to your children. What they say may be hurtful, but they need to be feeling supported at all times.
Watch their moodswings.
It is likely that your children act out because they are sad and angry. Take time to understand them and help them by distracting them from the problems in the home. Be as tolerant as you can and stay aware of their feelings.
Seek professional help.
Professional social counseling for the specific age-groups is available and this objective person can help you putting your children at ease with the feelings they experience. Sometimes it is easier to express these feelings to someone you know less wel.
Be on the alert for psychosomatic symptoms.
For some children it is difficult to express their worries and pain. Instead of externalizing and acting out, they develop migraines or tummy aches. To minimize long lasting effects on children of divorce, always ask a doctor to check out whether there is something serious or not.
Never seize to be a parent.
At all times both parents should stay involved in the childrens lives. See your children as often as you can, plan activities together with the children and be as present as possible. It takes both parents full time to help diminish long lasting effects of the divorce and to help the children to go through the divorce process as smoothly as possible.
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