Divorce Counseling for Children

Many parents seek counseling during or after a divorce. Divorce counseling for children appears more and more on the agenda of divorcing parents. Parents realise that a divorce has a big impact on children and that they should do something about it.

Both for parents and for children of divorce, there are practical, legal, social and emotional issues. Divorce counseling for children is often focussed on the effects of divorce on children.

Counseling for children or divorce makes them consious of the fact that they are not the only one's with their concerns and worries about their situation. The counselors try to identify the what the most difficult aspects of the divorce are for the children. They will learn tools and techniques about how to deal with these subjects.

Divorce group counseling for children is a good alternative for individual counseling. Apart from the cost savings, the participating children exchange each others experiences, feelings and emotions. They interact not only with the counselor, but also with children of their own age. When they hear other children talking about their doubts and worries, they usually become more open to tell about their feelings and emotions too.

Parents themselves can contribute to the well being of their children outside the counseling for children of divorce:

Make clear that the children are your top priority: walk the talk
Parents should keep their promises
Bring the whole family together when you tell your children about the divorce
Minimize the changes and disruptions in their daily routines
In the case of co-parenting, have the same rules in both houses
Make them clear the divorce is not their fault (often a very big issue for children of divorce)
Tell them that both mom and dad love them
Make them clear that they can love both mom and dad
Ensure that you both will continue taking care of them, just as before the divorce
Listen to the children
Answer their questions of the children
Do not argue in front of your children
Do not use your children as a messenger
Do not involve your children in the fight
Do not try to become the most popular parent
Do not discuss your financial situation with the children
Do not put your ex partner in a negative daylight

Divorce counseling helps helps your children to get cope with their feelings and emotions and to accept the radical change in their live quicker and better. Divorcing parents should consider divorce counseling for children.