Children are divorce's innocent victims. Counseling for Children of Divorce helps to reduce the stress and to adjust to the canges that occur after the break-up of their parents.
Parents sometimes participate in a divorce counseling program to make a smooth transition to their new situation. But what happens to the children? Due to the (upcoming) divorce, they undergo a lot of stress. Most of the time they do not understand what is happening and why.
For this very reason, children ought to be a part of a divorce counseling program. Their parents must learn how to assist their children to adjusting to the new situation they are in all of a sudden.
Divorcing parents can be looking for the following signals from their children. If those signals are obvious, it is time to consider Counseling for Children of Divorce:
- bad results at school: lowering grades, dedicating less time and attention to their homework, lack of focus and attention
- bad behavior at school: more fighting, bullying other children, ignoring friends, spending less time with friends, being socially isolated
- anger: the child becomes angry more often and unexpectedly to friends and to members of the family. This might be related to disappointment and confusion about the divorce
- depression: children that were happy once but experience chronic depression after the announcement of the divorce
Counseling reduces the trauma they can experience, a many professional researchers have found. The counseling gives them a neutral platform to talk about the divorce and to share their feelings. It gives them refief on the short term and they will benefit from it later in life when they step into adult relationships.
Here, the child has private sessions with the counselor only. There are no other persons present. It is important that the child trusts the counselor so that he or she feels free to express all his concerns and feelings.
In this type of counseling, the whole familiy is involved. Sessions can take place with the whole family or with only a few family members at the same time. Every member of the family can express their thoughts and feelings.
Usually, during group counseling each child in the group is given the opportunity to tell their story to the group. They can express their thoughts, fears, expectations, wishes and feelings. Because the other children in the group are in a similar situation, they will listen closely, express their understanding, ask questions and come up with suggestions from their own experience. The children can exchange their experiences: what works, what does not. They learn that they are not unique and that there are many more children of divorce.
There are many organisations and professionals offering Counseling for Children of Divorce. The most practical way is to Google for divorce counseling in your neighborhood.
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