Anger Child Divorce: How to manage your child’s anger
Control your Anger Child Divorce emotions. It may not be easy, but the key to co-parenting is focusing only on your children. Your own emotions (anger, resentment, or hurt) take second place to the needs of your children.
The hardest part of learning how to work in cooperation with your ex-partner is dealing with these strong feelings. However, this part of the co-parenting is vital. Only your children's hapiness and future is what matters. Three tips to set hurt and anger aside:
Separate feelings from behavior
Hurt and anger don't have to dictate your behavior. Your motivation to work together with the other parent should be the driver not the feelings. To control your anger childe divorce emotions, you could:
- Release your feelings somewhere else. There are good listeners around to get your negative feelings out of your system. Think of friends, therapists, or even a loving pet. Practice a healthy outlet for letting off steam and never vent to your children.
- Stay focused on your children. Always keep your children's best interest in mind. Act with purpose and grace if you feel angry or resentful. If the feelings start to become overwhelming, look at a photograph of your children to help you calm down.
- Release feelings through your body. To distract you from anger, consciously put your shoulders down, breath evenly and deeply, and stand erect. This will have a relaxing effect.
Do not put the children in the middle
Your resentment and bitterness about the separation may never really go away. However, you can compartmentalize these feelings and remind yourself that these are your issues and not those of your children. Keep all issues with your ex partner away from the children. To control your anger child divorce emotions, you could follow these tips:
- Do not use children as messengers. You put your children in the center of your conflict when you have your child tell the other parent something for you. Call or email your ex-partner yourself and keep the children out of your relationship issues.
- Do not say negative things about the other parent. Do not make them feel as if they have to choose between the two parents. Your children have a right to a relationship with the other parent, free of your influence.
Keep stress in check, no matter what
It may seem that there’s nothing you can do about your stress level, especially if you’re dealing with a painful divorce or the difficulties of being single again. But you have more control than you think. Find stress relief techniques and train yourself. (see articles on stress management).
Read this book about anger management and you will be able to teach your angry child to control it‘s anger: Child Anger Management for Parents.